I have no idea how many people have ventured to try DMT. Outside of its underground following and outside of its interest to a small number of academics, the number of people who have heard of DMT, let alone tried DMT, must be small to a significant decimal percentage of population. That we all have an endogenous trace quantity of this mysterious substance as part of our biology is all the more fascinating when one has tested its powerful psychedelic properties. But even then, calling the experience ‘psychedelic’ seems strangely inaccurate. It is not quite psychedelic in the same way that LSD is psychedelic. Its ability to conjure up the most bizarre scenery while one’s cognitive capacities remain largely unaffected, other than by profound astonishment, makes it a somewhat unique if not overwhelming experience.
It seems reasonable to surmise that Dr Rick Strassman’s government sanctioned research with DMT, and the subsequent documentary directed by Mitch Shultz, introduced a great many individuals to what Strassman has coined, the Spirit Molecule. Without forgetting the greats, the rebels and the legends that preceded Strassman – names such as: Stephen Szára, Timothy Leary, Terrence McKenna and Nick Sands – I suspect it will be Strassman who is remembered for vicariously introducing DMT to the masses. And it was through Strassman’s research and Shultz’ documentary that I first came to hear about DMT. Following extensive online research – reading the accounts of others posted within relevant internet forums – I eventually decided to try my hand at extracting DMT crystals from mimosa hostilis, and inhaling the vapours from a makeshift pipe.
My online research into the DMT experience led me to believe that I would somehow be rapidly whisked away to an alien landscape, or a bizarre dimension populated by elves and goblins; a realm where unspeakable wonders are commonplace. But my very first success with DMT was inhaling the vapour from perhaps just a few milligrams, while sat upon my bed one sunny Saturday morning. With very great rapidity there was a sudden amplification of a high pitched sound in the midst of my head. I was immediately taken aback by such an obvious display of power. But what then caught my attention was the fact that the entire room – even the air within the room – looked so incredibly crystal clear, and the countless protrusions from the decorative finish upon the ceiling were all spangled in dazzling spectral colours. I did not appreciate it at the time, but behind even those relatively mild effects was a realm of science beckoning for investigation and rational analysis. What was that sound amplifying in the midst of my head? Why would the room suddenly seem wrought in crystal clear clarity? And what could possibly cause such dazzling spectral colours to radiate from the decorative protrusions upon the ceiling?
In the months that followed I continued to investigate the effects of DMT from the comfort of home. I was happy to undertake this research without any supervision, and really, the only person I could have asked to watch over me was my wife. It is true that no amount of reading can prepare you for the experience. I witnessed strange and impossible things that totally confounded my rational senses. There was much shaking of my head, and many incredulous mutterings along the lines of: “Impossible, that is simply impossible – impossible…impossible…impossible!” And yet time and time again the impossible would manifest and trample over my rational senses. It did indeed seem that I was actually venturing into another world, or another dimension – a place peopled with strange humanlike entities; a world filled with impossible to describe scenery and objects that defy explanation; a world that looked very different to this world. But one that looked strangely far more real than ordinary everyday reality. What on earth was going on?
I decided to investigate by establishing my very own research programme. Knowing the seriousness of this commitment I decided to make a few lifestyle changes and duly commenced my unsupervised home-based research programme with vaporous DMT. My sole intention was to try to understand exactly what was occurring in the experience, and how it was occurring. I had no thought to publish my research at that stage. I stopped frequenting the usual DMT internet forums – so as to avoid the influence of others – and from October 2013, I set to work. There were, of course, influences that would shape my thinking. I had a longstanding interest in esoteric lore and occult philosophy. Those interests were likely formed early in my childhood, as a consequence of several paranormal experiences, such as out-of-body excursions around the family home at night time.
In three years of research I undertook some 650 individual experiments with DMT. I was not setting out to take heavy doses, or to go further than anybody else; my intention was simply to try and understand the mechanics of the bizarre experiences. I implicitly understood that I was dealing with something of truly profound proportion; a mystery in which we were still operating at the data-collection stage. And I wanted to collect data, and analyse that data in order to understand what was going on.
Speaking for myself, based on the doses, the experiments undertaken, and my reflections and analyses of what I have experienced, the truth is both surprising and unsurprising. One should not be at all surprised to find that one is dealing with individual spiritual entities in this research. Whether one is ready for the truly devastating power that some of these beings are able to impose is another matter. I can categorically state that I have not undertaken any intergalactic travels, either in my body or out of my body. I can categorically state that having significantly amplified my consciousness with DMT, I have suddenly found myself immersed and enveloped within the mind of a spiritual being, whose own imaginative fancies have imposed upon my perceptions – and certainly given me the impression that I was in another realm, another world, another dimension.
I can categorically state that these beings have the capacity to manipulate one’s psyche and induce ecstatic states of laughter unlike anything you have ever experienced. I can categorically state that these beings have the power to convince you that you are dead. I can categorically state that these beings have the power to undertake the most bizarre invasive operations within one’s physiology. I can categorically state that I have cried and bawled like a little boy at what has been done to me. I can categorically state that I have experienced the unbelievable bountifulness of my own consciousness spiralling out of me and filling the sky high above me. I can categorically state that in my small back garden I have attracted and observed vast and phenomenally configured spiritual entities that look like they have no earthy business down at ground level. I can categorically state that my outdoor research has attracted what many would describe as earth lights, or black orb UFOs. I can categorically state that I have been: entertained; tricked; terrified; left awestruck; dumbfounded; perplexed; and initiated into a way of thinking that would otherwise qualify me as doolally.
But life goes on! I go to work and I love my family. But I am not the same, and I never will be the same, because like other dedicated psychonautical explorers, I have experienced something that profoundly challenges the very fundamental foundations of western culture and western science, let alone one’s own ontological compass. It is not that change is coming, because change is already well underway. I cannot and would not be so conceited as to pretend that I have all the answers. Indeed, despite my best efforts, I contend that I have not even scratched the surface of this unfathomable mystery. Hence, may I encourage other dedicated psychonautical researchers to move toward publishing the findings from their own research programmes, so that we may further progress in the data collection stage?